Hey

I'm gonna blog somemore. I blog my feelings out, at that present time. Up to you how to intepret how loserish i am.

I'm not blogging about my angst tonight. Those who don't know what is reality can go somewhere else and live your merry bubble, then look and stare and laugh at a loser and nerd like me.

I was watching this chinese show about a man with Parkinson's disease, and the implications that he brings on to his family members. In the living room... With my aunt D. When there was a commercial break, she went off to put her bowl in the kitchen (she just eats at that time, i don't know the fuck why). So the dog XiXi that dumbo went and ate up the fucking bones and stuff that she spat out. INCLUDING A SOMETHING. This something is when you open a mineral water bottle (like ice mountain) cap, there will be a small round shape thing below that you can take out? Well that's that SOMETHING. and if Xixi swallow it i do not know how its gonna get out cos she's a dog and all. She might even suffocate lar.

Don't ask me WHY XIXI EATING EVERY FUCKING THING THAT SMELLS OF FOOD. I don't know she's not my dog. Don't ask me WHY THE FUCK IS THAT SOMETHING DOING THERE, IN A PILE OF STUFF THAT AUNT D SPAT OUT. Cos i don't have the fucking reasons.

So aunt D snapped. She screamed at me "why you let her eat it?"

Excuse me, 8am in school this morning. I came back at 11plus. I watched TV until want to peng. I was practically sleeping when xixi go and sneak up and gobble the thing. I held her jaw, didnt work she wouldnt budge. Then my cousin B came out and saw what happened. And he tried to open her jaw (not forcibly, but TRIED to lar.). Didn't work of course. He got pissed (he always gets pissed. at the computer he'll curse, cos it hangs and restarts spontaneously. I tell him to do something about it, but he doesnt). He said he'll force it out and he is one to do that.

All this time aunt D was bitching and "HAI" very loudly and being an absolute irritant. I didn't even know the fucking reason why she got so worked up. It's not like SHE was the one who gobbled that dumb piece of rubbish.

So i snapped. I told her "stop being so irritating. i see you at home everyday doing nothing. can you stop being angry about every fucking thing. you never find a fucking job also. Moon-heng mai mai oso give you job you don't go. You know everytime i see you at home doing nothing it makes me feel like shit"

she reply "what do you know about job. i work so much for years and the pressure is so much. i just want to take a break from work. I'm also sick."

Then i said 'why are you sick? why you never say? we are family. ni bu yao gen wo men jiang, ni gen shui jiang?'

i walk up and down lar. i buay tahan. fucking fucking angry. all this time xixi still hang on to the stupid plastic SOMETHING.

my grandma woke up and go and tie a rope around and try to coax xixi into letting go.like tugging at the rope and say "xixi ahhhh! " very cute lar. she not angry and not pissed off. she even ask me to stop arguing with aunt D, even though aunt D screams at her sometimes. When i'm never there.

then i thought of like, "when the fuck is she gonna open her jaws and let it out? never lar. let her get tapioca oso dunwan to eat."

XIXI LIKES TAPIOCA I DON'T HAVE THE REASON FOR THAT.

then i thought, "hey no1 can resist fried stuff. What's more, if a dog's olfactory glands are potent enough to smell cancer, surely she can't resist the approximately x100 magnified fragrance of ikan bilis.(albeit soggy, since the ikan bilis was fried like, in the afternoon. But i can't help it, noting else short of REALLY FORCING her mouth open. I can't do that.)"

Sure enough i washed my hands (had too much dog spit -_-) and i took 1 piece of small fish. i brought it to her nose and she started sniffing lar. I was down there "MMMM IKANBILIS BETTER THAN PLASTIC SOMETHING-OR-OTHER" sweet-talking her, that crazy dog. She still didnt budge. I came back with 5 more ikan bilis and she couldn't stand it. She open her mouth. My cousin B took out the plastic SOMETHING and i took my hands out of the way, cos salt causes xixi to have skin problems (again, I DON"T HAVE THE REASON WHY).

I felt so bad that i bluffed xixi, i asked aunt D to feed her tapioca.

My granny, she can laugh. she say 'waaaaa so li hai can coax xixi out of that'. she very cute lar. then she went back to sleep. haha.

I went to shower.

After that i talked to aunt D. i said 'sorri to blow my top.'

That's not the end.

End point is that we managed to talk things over. Calmly. I dont want to talk about this liao byes.